Wednesday, February 15, 2006

My morning routine

5.45: alarm rings
5.46: kettle and TV switched on
5.50: back under duvet watching news on TV
6.05: ablutions and shower
6.20: get dressed and get things ready to go
6.29: walk downstairs to get my lift
6:30: get into lift’s car

Usually the lift is there a bit before I get out of the front door so he waits for me outside the door. If I get down before he arrives, I walk to the corner which makes it easier for him. I’d been waiting there for just over a minute this morning when the sleek Audi whisked past me and parked outside my flat. At that time of morning, it’s still very dark and I was standing next to a large skip so he must have not seen me.

I strolled over at a brisk pace and opened the back door, placing my briefcase on the seat as I tried to sound bright and cheerful.

‘Good morning, David!’

I closed the back door and was ready to open the front to jump in when my slowly wakening mind registered something different.

I opened the back door again. A very bemused man, not David, was looking at me.

‘Oops,’ I said, ‘wrong car. I’m so sorry!’

He didn’t say a thing as I removed my briefcase, closed the door and crossed the road to go back to the corner where I’d been standing. About a minute later, I was still waiting for David when he got out of the car. He looked long and hard at me.

I can’t be sure but I think he was smiling.


Anonymous Alan said...

You got into a strange mans car, smiled and didn't end up having sex ! You must be losing it.

1:50 pm  
Anonymous Alan said...

And how many Davids do you know ? It must be getting hard to keep tabs on them all remembering who you have done what with, etc !

2:01 pm  
Blogger Spookie the Warrior said...

Hee, sounds like something I might do. Thats funny!!

2:17 pm  
Blogger xmichra said...

hehe.. i would smile too! Especially if some cute guy jumped in a car with me!

2:25 pm  
Blogger portuguesa nova said...


I once got suckered into going to a play in downtown Chicago with my boss's wife and a friend of hers. She insisted on driving, even though it makes no sense to drive in downtown Chicago, because they'd just gotten a brand, brand, brand new white Mercedes.

Well, the drive to the theater was particularly traumatic for her in terms of city driving aggression and traffic and construction and basically it was a lot of inner turmoil for me not to scream, "That's why we have public transportation and cabs!"

So, we valeted the car, but when the play was over, she insisted that I drive back.

The valet arrived with the car, and I was feelign pretty cool, getting to drive a brand new Mercedes, and we were about 5 miles outside of the downtown area when boss's wife's friend, from the back seat said, "Can I ask you something...why do you have a stapler in the back seat of your car...and is this your green hat?"

They parking guys had brought us the wrong car.

I nearly had a heart attack thinking I was going to be pulled over for auto theft.

When we returned to the theater, the real owners of the other brand new white Mercedes were not nearly as understanding as you might imagine.

2:42 pm  
Anonymous patita said...

Oh my, getting into a strange car without even an offer of candy! Sounds like an easy morning mistake. I'm glad the driver had a decent sense of humor.

4:27 pm  
Blogger Reluctant Nomad said...

alan: I know at least 4 Davids in Nottingham and that's excluding my lift.

justme: I'm surprised it hasn't happened before - my life seems too full of dopey episodes like that.

xmichra: I'm hoping that's a not so subtle hint to say that I'm cute! :-)

portuguesa: that's hilarious!

patita: had that happened in South Africa, the driver would probably have thought he was getting car-jacked. A misunderstanding like that could even result in someone getting shot.

4:34 pm  
Blogger Caroline said...

Are you sure you weren't dreaming?

The nearest I have got to offer back is that I have approached the wrong car in a car park and frantically zapped my keys at it, much to the real owner's amusement... he said "I'm glad I'm not the only one who does that" before getting into his car...

4:38 pm  
Blogger PJ said...

Not in Nottingham, but near enough that the Broadway is my nearest decent arts cinema.

4:45 pm  
Blogger Terri said...

Lucky you weren't somewhere like Jo'burg - chances are he would've thought you were a car-jacker and shot you.
Sorry my first comment is so cynical ;-)

I really liked your story about the live brooch b.t.w.

6:04 pm  
Blogger Niles said...

Pah -- you should eat some breakfast!

6:10 pm  
Blogger xmichra said...

silly boy, you know you are a cutie!! But i would have had a chuckle anyways... hehe

7:34 pm  
Blogger PJ said...

20 seconds? See, that's just showing off... Think 40 minutes, maybe. But worth it for the meal deal and a pint of Curlew. ;-)

9:38 pm  
Blogger Reluctant Nomad said...

pj: would that be in the sticks , a town or a village or none of the above? Of course I'm showing off about how convenient the place is for me. A few weeks ago, returning to the flat at about 3am , the police wouldn't allow me into the road for about half an hour as someone was trying to jump off the scaffolding cladding the cinema.

terri: it may be a cynical comment but it's almost exactly what I said a few comments above yours. glad you liked the brooch story and welcome.

xmichra: you've said that twice now but you don't think I'm innocent - oh woe is me.

niles: breakfast? I don't eat anything until I get to work about an hour and a half after leaving the flat.

caroline: I was definitely awake but my mind may have been elsewhere.

10:43 pm  
Blogger rhino75 said...

I really like this story as it could so easily have happened to me. Nowadays I'm on permanent lates and so I don't have to be at the office until 10h00 (bliss!) but for years I had to be in at anytime between 5h30 and 7h00. The only advantage was that I got a car in, and I used to do exactly the same thing as you, trundle downstairs half asleep and get into whatever vehicle was waiting just outside my door!! A risky business. ;-))

11:17 pm  
Blogger kyknoord said...

Who leaves their back door unlocked these days? That sounds suspiciously like an invitation to me.

7:54 am  
Blogger Reluctant Nomad said...

rhino: the nice thing about being driven by someone is that I get to be lulled to a really good doze while listening to Radio 4. I don't fall into a full-blown sleep on the 1hr20min journey but there are usually one or two times when I almost break my neck as it snaps back when something jolts me out of my reveries.

kyknoord: you're quite right, even the poms are a bit paraonoid about car theft (with justification) these days. Car-jacking is very rare outside London so people are, perhaps, less concerned about locked doors when they're in the car. Nottingham, however, is the gun-crime capital of the UK - a policeman was shot here two days ago. Also, perhaps he's just got ready to get out and the back doors opened automatically when he opened the front one?

I half suspected to do the same thing this morning but there was no sign of him.

9:17 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ha ha, ha, haaaa; you're so easy, you'll jump into anybody's back seat.

12:00 am  

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