Monday, September 05, 2005

Another rescue package arrives.

Smirnoff - the headIt rained last night and the sun seems a bit wary about showing itself today. But, it's still warm enough to sit outside while drinking my tea and sucking on a Marlboro. The chair was mostly dry but I should've wiped it before plonking myself down - walking around with a slightly damp arse isn't that pleasant but I can't be bothered to change.

Smirnoff - the neckBeing job-less should keep my mind very focused on what I need to do to get out of this situation but my mind was on other things - sex, the fig tree covered in little green figs that show no sign of ripening, DH Lawrence, sex, the constant drone of aeroplanes above, the recently sequenced genome of the chimpanzee, the complete shut-down of my sex life, the dwindling numbers of Marlboros, etc, etc.

Smirnoff- the torsoI noticed a green and yellow van pull up outside the gate and saw someone walk to the front door with a parcel. I'm not so sure that I approve of 'healthy competition' that challenges the dominance of the little red post van. In my idealistic youth, I was a committed Marxist but I became more capitalist as I grew older. These days, I seem to have 'regressed' to some extent and have become rather disillusioned by unfettered capitalism. I digress..

Smirnoff - the abdomenA parcel? James did warn me that something may arrive today. I wonder if it's from him? A few minutes later, there was a call from D, "Alan, there's something here for you". I sprinted (um, moved rapidly) towards the house. D looked rather bemused, obviously wondering what yet another parcel could mean. "You haven't been spending your money, have you?" he asked. "What money?" I asked.

Smirnoff - the bottom I didn't even bother to look where the parcel was from or who had sent it as I knew that it had to be from James. Quite a large rectangular box from which emanated a rather intriguing sound, the sound of something heavy-ish sliding about. "Interesting, very interesting," I thought. I opened it.

Inside was a purple box, well, lilac to be exact, about 45cm long and 15 cm wide. Something long, very long, something quite heavy, rather thick too. I opened it.

Smirnoff Red - the bottle

James, now I'm really set up for never leaving this place. Marlboros and reading matter from Mike, booze from you. But what about the sex? Can I look forward to another parcel soon?


Blogger Miss Mish said...

There's something from me at the end of the week too....

4:40 pm  
Blogger Reluctant Nomad said...

Thank you, but you really don't have to. Um, is it about 6ft tall, firm and has broad shoulders?

4:51 pm  
Blogger Miss Mish said...

No - can't afford the postage
We were all supposed to get it togehter and you would have had all the parcels at the same time but as you can see.... we're not organised

5:02 pm  
Blogger mike said...

"But what about the sex? Can I look forward to another parcel soon?"

Don't push your luck, mate!

Or alternatively: be careful what you wish for. I'm sure that A. could be gift-wrapped, and dispatched inside a cake.

7:30 pm  
Blogger Reluctant Nomad said...

It would be pushing my luck..not nice to appear greedy. Beggars can't be choosers, and all that.

Please, please, no cakes with a gift-wrapped A!

1:05 am  

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